No Game

Suffolk League

Division One

Castaways 2 V Ipswich 5
Result: 3-1

Ipswich were put under pressure from the start from Castaways and found
themselves rarely getting out of their own D during the first 15 mins or so. It wasn't long before Castaways scored a messy goal. The sudden face of another defeat made Ipswich very determined and for the rest of the first half took control of the game, and managed to bring the scores back to 1-1, through a superb strike by Nic Hart slipping it past the goal keepers left side. By the end of the first half though Ipswich were 2-1 down and knew a win wasn't out of reach.
Ipswich came out fighting in the second half and had possession most of the second half. Ipswich had a great chance cleared off the line by the Castaways defence and were unlucky not to bring the score line level. With less than 5 mins to go, Castaways surged forward with some great play down the right wing, were just too quick for the Ipswich team , scoring their third and wrapping up the match. The 5's find themselves slipping closer to the foot of the table. Lets hope we start the New Year with a win.

 Printwize East League Premier A

Sat 14th December

Ipswich v Chelmsford 2nd's

Result: Won 5-2

Ipswich continued their winning ways in the Printwize East Premier division on Saturday with an impressive victory over Chelmsford 2XI. In their last game before the Christmas break, Ipswich were looking for another three points to take them well clear of the relegation zone. 

Chelmsford started the brighter of the two sides and looked like taking the lead through Rob Wallbank whose first time shot was well saved by Stuart Hendy. Ipswich then managed to play themselves back into the match and slick passing between the midfield and forwards created chance after chance. The Suffolk side are still guilty of not making the most of their opportunities and it looked like this game would be no exception. Richard Fox, Paul Calver and James Smith all had chances to open the scoring but the deadlock was eventually broken through a wonderful display of individual skill. 

Richard Stainthorpe picked up the ball deep inside the Chelmsford half and beat four defenders before making space for himself to slip the ball past Dan Tilly in the Chelmsford goal. Chelmsford were soon on level terms when Matt Bell scored from a short corner after 25 minutes and the scoreline remained even for the remainder of the first half.

Ipswich totally dominated the second half and Chelmsford were guilty of slack defending and lapses in concentration. The home side took the lead again from the penalty spot through Chris Palmer following a foul by Tilly on Stainthorpe. The home side increased their lead seven minutes later when an attacking move down the left flank saw Calver’s precision pass find Fox on the back line who in turn laid the ball on to Palmer who sent the ball high into the net for his second of the game. 

Despite the two goal cushion, Ipswich still looked vulnerable at times and Chelmsford made the most of their few second half chances. They managed to pull another goal back through David Kitchener following good work from Josh Mipham.

Sensing another potential ‘banana skin’, Ipswich were not content with holding onto a slender lead and victory was sealed five minutes from time when James Smith scored his first goal for the club. The ex-Harleston player fired the ball home after a short corner was switched to him on the right hand side. 

There was still enough time for Ipswich to score a fifth goal and this time it came courtesy of a splendid move on the right hand side. Matt Walker stole the ball on the half-way line and his accurate pass found Smith with time and space on the right flank. Smith’s ball into the danger area found Darren Bosher with only the keeper to beat but unselfishly he drew Tilly out of position and laid the ball square to Chris Palmer to score into the open net to for a richly deserved hat-trick.

Printwize East League

Division 4 S.E

Ipswich 4th's v IES 3rd's

BELIEVE YOUR eyes – 32 seconds on the clock and the 4’s were one up after Aussie Jim ghosted onto a predictable square pass as ISC4’s pressed a nervous IES3 start and with the interception complete and only the keeper between him and the fastest goal of the season he clinically chipped into the net. 

30 seconds later and a second had been added after IES reacted with all the urgency of a koala with a ketamine habit and Wobbler pounced onto the ball up soon after the restart before setting up on fire Michael “Pram Boy” Leyche who thundered the ball into the net for a glorious opening of his account and, as a meaningful contest, the game was over. 

The hungry fours were not content and went in search of more goals after a brief revival of fortunes saw IES3’s apply what can charitably be called attacking hockey. Then with the smell of blood and fear in the air, wave after wave of incisive passing saw the overwhelming of the home team’s defence. 

First half goals being added by Wobbler who pulled off goal of the game with an exquisite back stick lobe over a reeling keeper, Air Shot after swooping with the scavenging instinct of a hooded vulture onto a goal bound Heavy Night shot and Pram Boy getting his second though I forget how.

Half time, five nil and feeling pretty happy with an all round great team performance, Wobbler announced that only he was allowed to dribble since he was the only team member capable of doing. Arrogant and rather irritatingly true.

The second half was by comparison a rather flat affair with the most notably events related to an increasingly dirty and outclassed IES keeper taking out Ipswich forwards. When a penalty flick was finally awarded it was not before time. 

IES should have been reduced to 10 men. However their padded man stayed on the pitch thanks to some over generous and dangerous umpiring allowed him to get away with, well, not quite murder but rank and injuring risking incompetence. Naughty whistler blower and thanks to Cookie for maintaining some sort of a grip on an increasingly lawless second half.

Pram Boy stepped up to convert and added the only goal of the second half. IES refused to roll over completely but the 4’s got in some good pass and move practice with the exception of the showboating Wobbler. It was a wonder to behold and a pleasure to play such selfless hockey. Gratuitous self-congratulation and mutual back slapping all round please.

Now to the day’s curiosity - Alex “Never Happy” Fletton stormed off after the match. Bemused teammates were somewhat puzzled when, far from savouring handing out a hockey lesson to IES, he swore a bit before stomping off with all the mannerisms of a petulant schoolgirl having her first period. An explanation is required once you’ve raised a second mortgage to pay your fines. Sources close to the sideline report that one passing sports fan said, “?!”

Man of the match went to hat trick happy Pram Boy, who got the nod ahead of strong cases for the honour that came in from Wobbler and, surprisingly, Aussie for the second week running. Though to be honest the entire team were worthy of wearing black on Saturday night. 

Anyway, a virtually redundant Biggers kept a third clean sheet in a row and the result sees the fours climbing into the mid-table slots with a chance to keep the momentum going with the replay away to Witham 2’s before the turkeys get the bad news.

Footnote;

Lads, do you fancy getting to know this cheeky little beaver over the festive season? If you do then call 0898 696969.